As yet I just haven't been round to comment and the reason is that I had the most beautiful email from my friend Sue's husband Jim after her funeral. It shook me to the core and I've cried a lot on Sunday, how can I ever feel I made a difference - but apparently Jim thought I did. Here's just part:
I know you were a great help in supporting Susan through her recovery from
the throat cancer. Not just by taking her out and about but also allowing
her to feel feminine again. For which I am grateful. I am not so
sure about encouraging the interest in handicrafts as Susan was never one to do
things by half and so the place began to fill up with every piece of equipment
and stock, ready for her retirement. Of course, I have to admit to aiding
and abetting as we didn’t know retirement would be so short and painful.
We sure did work hard on the recovery and also the feminine bit quite a few years (10 or so) ago. One day I took Sue to the hairdresser to have her waist length hair trimmed ('only slightly Di she cried') and then her hair, which hadn't been touched for weeks due to radiation therapy, was gently and so carefully washed by my hairdresser. Sue was swathed in bandages around her throat at the time and I sat holding her hand making sure the bandages didn't get damp. I don't want praise, it's just what happened. It happens girls.
As Sue grew stronger the next stage was to take her out and about to build her confidence, swathed in floaty scarves and we did get into some mischief for sure! One day I'll reveal all :)
Then as Sue was back to work and much stronger we used to meet up one evening a week every Wednesday, as I'd stopped the dreadful commute to London cycle and so we didn't see each other every evening on the train. We met in a well known local department store for 'tea and cakes'. Snigger, and then, with Sue still wearing floaty scarves to hide the vicious scars ...... we used to try all their new hats and fascinators on and clown around :) Ha, am amazed we didn't get asked to leave really!
I did smile about the abundance of handicraft goodies Jim spoke about - Sue would walk into a store, look around, grin and then say 'I'll take one of everything please' ! Never did things by half :)
Oh my little friend Sue, they were such bitter-sweet days. Sleep well - you fought bravely for so many years. And I guess now you're getting God to try fancy hats on huh?
Love always from
Di
x
Love you huni, sending huge sloppy hugs xx
ReplyDeleteWhat a beautiful post Di. So full of love.
ReplyDeleteBiggest hugs my dear friend,
Annie x
What a lovely funny, touching post. Be happy with your memories, Di
ReplyDeleteAll the best
Kathyk
What a lovely tribute her husband gave to you and you in turn have given here to your friend.
ReplyDeletei am sorry for your loss, /sue sounds like a fun friend to have and you sound like a rock through tough times with a friend.
Hugs
Maureen
Morning Di . . . sending hugs your way. xxxx
ReplyDeleteThat's so lovely that Sue's hubby is taking comfort in the wonderful memories he has of you both, hope you find comfort in those happy memories too :) sending hugs to you, Cathy x
ReplyDeleteHope the pain eases, and you start to find comfort in all of the special little times you shared.
ReplyDeleteIt's so sad for you to lose such a fabulous friend Di but that letter from her husband must go a long way to making you realise that you did make a difference and that both he and Sue appreciated your friendship. And do take comfort from that. Hugs, Elizabeth xx
ReplyDeletex
ReplyDeleteSending big hug!
ReplyDeleteTamara
How touching and sad... I am sure you DID make a big difference and enriched her life Di. Bless you. Sending huge sloppy hugs.
ReplyDeleteIKE in Greece xoxoxoxoxox
You brighten all our lives, Di! Thank you for being such a loving friend.
ReplyDeleteAw bless. You make a difference to everyone Honey whether it be in person or online.
ReplyDeleteHugs
xx
I agree with Hettie Di..just through blogging I've met an amazing person and that's you! you will always have your memories of Sue that will bring a smile or tear lots of huggles Sue xxxxx
ReplyDeleteWhat a beautiful post I can just imagine you as an extremely caring friend. I did resort to tears, reminded me of my "best friend" I lost 4 years ago next month. You were obviously an amazing friend, you will always have the fantastic memories.
ReplyDelete(((((hugs)))))
Patricia xxx
Sorry Di, I have made a Boo! Boo! again.........I really am hopeless at this linking business
ReplyDeleteI meant to put up my Wicker wreath that I use all the bits from my box for the flowers and leaves.
Patricia xxx
This post really got to me Di - I'm sending you a big virtual hug.
ReplyDeleteLove Sue P xxx
That was a beautiful post and what a wonderful man is Sue's Jim. I'm sitting here in tears, less in sadness, than in joy that you and Jim were blessed to have had Sue in your lives and vice versa. What beautiful souls and fun personalities you all possess!! Thanks for sharing, Di. Hugs, Darnell
ReplyDeleteHi Di,
ReplyDeletethank you for sharing those precious memories with us.
She sounded like a very special lady, and real treasure to know.
Lots of love and hugs. Jenny L.
Hats off to you Di.
ReplyDeleteVery sad, very lovely and she was very lucky to have a friend like you and it is nice for you to know that you were appreciated.
Well done Girl.
Love
Kath x
Such good memories you've shared with us. How nice!
ReplyDeleteAnd yes, it happens.
And yes, I giggled that you may not get praise for turning Sue onto the handicrafts. hee hee
My heart breaks for you and your loss. She was clearly a treasured friend and so lucky to have you and her hubby to surround her with love and support!
ReplyDeleteSending love.
ReplyDeleteWell I'm crying with you, Di--so sad to loose a friend & loved one. I know you will always treasure her husband's note. A reminder that none of us know how long we have here--never enough that wasting it is OK. Thinking of you, Greta
ReplyDeleteVery touching - you made me cry. Sending you love and lots of hugs, Cornelia
ReplyDeleteOh my dear little Pixie girl. I always knew you were one of the "Special People". This post only reinforced my belief. Thank you for sharing your friend's journey & your sharing of it with her. I can well imagine her & her DH's gratitude for you just doing what you would do! That ain't a pity party, honey chile. You were grieving over your missing friend. Who will always be with you in your heart. And I'm so pleased her husband took the time to write you of his feelings and let you know just how much of a difference you made to his loved one. So you cry when you need to, remember Sue always, and when you see a pretty hat or make a hat card, well, that will be Sue & rembrance for you. Big hugs! I had no idea what you meant in the later post's pity party. Didn't dream it was a serious thing. But thanks again for sharing. And more hugs for comfort. (See I told you that you don't know the difference you make in people's lives..even those whom you do not know, except in Cyberspace! )
ReplyDeleteIt brought a tear to the eye. You were a true friend Sue and I bet she is up there looking down on you and egging you on to try yet more hats on. Just run to the playground when you do; fling the hat high in the air and let the wind float it up there to Sue. She will be ready to catch it.
ReplyDeleteHugs to you
Liz